Ten Ways to Practice Extreme Couponing

This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

Well, as I’m sure you guys may have already heard by now the season premier of Extreme Couponing came on last night on TLC.  I’ve been watching some of the previews and let me tell you some of those folks are most definitely EXTREME!

If you’ve been reading my site for a while then you’ll know that I practice Golden Rule Couponing.  If you want to save over 50% on groceries that your family can use in a practical way then go here to get started.

However, If you’re set on becoming an Extreme Couponing Kind of Couponer then you’ll want to follow these 10 steps(Tongue in Cheek, Of Course).

  • Quit your job, get a sitter, hire a housekeeper — Do whatever you need to do to free yourself about 30-40 hours per week.  You WILL need this time to prepare for your massive trips to multiple stores each week.
  • Buy some heavy duty gloves and maybe a hazmat suit.  You’ll need these so you can dumpster dive safely for coupons. Oh and the hazmat suit will also help protect you from the flamers who are out to get you because they just don’t understand extreme couponing.
  • Move your car(s) into the driveway.  You won’t be able to park them in the garage any longer with the rows and rows of shelves used to store your massive stockpile.
  • You will need as many copies of the Sunday Paper as you can possibly get your hands on so Beg, Borrow, Dumpster Dive or Steal them – It’s just paper!
  • Clear those shelves Baby!!!  Don’t leave anything else for other folks who might come up after you.  They snooze, they lose!  Your needs are much more important than theirs!
  • Get over your Waste Not, Want Not philosophy!  With all your shelf clearing and massive stockpile building you will most likely have hundreds of dollars in items that will go bad before you can possibly use them.  Don’t sweat it!  I know..those items could have been used by folks who needed them but that’s ok….It’s the thrill of the hunt that counts, right?
  • Be sure to shop the first day of a sale  AND later in the week!  You don’t want to leave anything for the other shoppers!  If another shopper gets in your way just tell them you were there first and to BACK OFF!
  • Show the store employees who’s the boss! You are the customer…They are there to serve you and take ALL your coupons regardless of store policy.  If they get in your way just pitch a tantrum and tell them you’ll never shop there again — That’ll show them!
  • Start a Blog – Oh yes…Once you start practicing Extreme Couponing everyone will want to read about how you did it and you’ll need to educate them!  Just make sure they don’t shop at your stores!
  • Last but not Least — Don’t be concerned with Store Policies and the like.  Nah, Just find a store that will bend them for you and you will be JUST FINE!

If you follow those guidelines you will be well on your way to becoming like those you’ll see featured on Extreme Couponing(as they are portrayed anyway because we know many of them are misrepresented).  Oh, and you also have probably found yourself on the WRONG SITE!    That’s because I do not promote any of these practices, and will not be condoning them AT ALL.

However, If you really want to save some money on your groceries in a REAListic way then stick around!  Get started with couponing the right way.

This post is linked up at Top Ten Tuesday on Many Little Blessings.

 

Comments

  1. Rebecca says:

    Love your post!!! Made me laugh. I don’t do extreme couponing and I don’t watch the show. :) I do save 50-60% buying products we’ll use that are on sale and that I have coupons for.

  2. Rebecca D. says:

    I never laughed so hard!!! I needed that laugh! They show how they paid “nothing” really?!! Printer ink?! Paper?! That all costs money…So inanimate things are better and worth spending time with than the kids right? And the balls to have the kids clip coupons for them..wonderful parenting! Also, greed is a sin. They should have an episode where the homeless get to pick and choose what they want… Also, practice practical couponing.

  3. sajia says:

    OMG!!! My cheeks are burning laughing so hard….i love your post and love love the pounding of your words for the thick headed ones….i mean how insane can you be to think you can do that on a regular basis, besides what on earth would you do with all that stockpile of godknows what….i think its the worst way of getting yourself into HOARDING…normal people will not need to empty out their bedrooms to store groceries they wont even get to use them, and if they do they become insanely obese….sad and pethitic…

  4. Melissa Hills-Judson via Facebook says:

    No I refuse to watch that show. It has increased my grocery bill too much and I only buy what I need to feed my family!:(

  5. No!!! I will not watch, most of those crazies give a bad name to couponing! They need to be on “hoarders” not “extreme couponing” :)

  6. RAnn says:

    Love it

  7. Ha! This is hilarious!!

Trackbacks

  1. [...] Ten Ways to Practice Extreme Couponing Ah, yes, our favorite show rears it’s ugly head once again. Thankfully, you too can become an extreme couponer! Hopefully you aren’t too attached to actually having a life though. [...]